Speak to the Rock

We all heard the story: the Jews needed water in the desert, G-d tells Moses to speak to the rock and it will give its waters, Moses hit the rock instead of speaking to it and was therefore denied the great merit of entering the land of Israel.

As the Torah states:  

"The Lord spoke to Moses, saying: Take the staff and assemble the congregation, you and your brother Aaron, and speak to the rock in their presence so that it will give forth its water. You shall bring forth water for them from the rock and give the congregation and their livestock to drink." Moses took the staff from before the Lord as He had commanded him. Moses and Aaron assembled the congregation in front of the rock, and he said to them, "Now listen, you rebels, can we draw water for you from this rock?" Moses raised his hand and struck the rock with his staff twice, when an abundance of water gushed forth, and the congregation and their livestock drank."

There are many mysteries in this story; let’s start with the basics: if G-d was so upset with Moses, why did he then perform a miracle causing water to gush forth from a rock despite Moses hitting the rock? And why was G-d so offended by the hitting of the rock instead of speaking to it?

If I believe that something is beyond my reach - that I can't master this wisdom, learn to play this instrument, or overcome this challenge - there are two ways you can help me grow. You can force me to do it. You can just throw me into the pool and I'll have no choice but to figure out how to swim. I will be forced to achieve what I thought was impossible. I will, however, achieve this only because of a force outside of myself. The downside is that since the growth is forced upon me by external circumstances, therefore once the circumstances change I will be back to my old self.

The more effective option is for you to show me that deep within me lies abundant potential; you show me that to grow I need not look to a force outside me rather I need to look inward. Only when the growth is not forced upon me, will it last.

You want to teach your child, or your student, yet you feel you hit a wall; he or she just does not get it. You began to think "I am wasting my time, there is no one home". You feel like your only option is to “hit the rock”, to force the growth upon then, by applying pressure from the outside, by the force of your charisma, or by the threat of consequence, or an award of a vacation to Europe. You will probably manage to get some water out of the rock. But you missed the point.  

Or you can “speak” to what to you looks like a rock. You think your child cannot listen, understand and identify with the message, understand that you are misjudging. G-d says: “speak to the rock in their presence so that it will give forth its water”, what appears to you as a rock is a fountain. Speak again and again, dig deeper and deeper, and you’ll discover the water.   

Chesed Shel Emes

I've recently been at a few funerals and I have been thinking about that which we say that the Mitzvah of burying someone is a Chesed Shel Emes because it cannot be repaid.
It seemed to me that extra hasbarah was called for because it is possible for a variety of reasons to gain benefit, e.g. from relatives or onlookers who now respect you more etc.
So the focus is on the deceased, and this applies whether you them or not. How does one truly express friendship and brotherhood? It is a true expression when it is done without calculations and that expresses itself when the fellow is deceased and there is no possibility of give and take and therefore this is the truest expression of friendship. And this is perhaps even better expressed when you didn't know the deceased, it is even a truer expression of Ahavas Yisrael.
We can connect this to Emes made up of the letters Aleph, Mem and Tuv. There is no hefsek.
But like everything in the world there can be corruption mitzad taruvis tov v'ra, So it is upon us to make sure that like everything else we need to make sure we are focused on the right reason for it.

Blood vs. Frogs, Which is worse?

In Lku"s the Rebbe says that kaltkeit is worse then a varemkeit for bad things as it easier co-opted and returned to the good.
I find that many people who have trouble believing in G-d have very heightened sense of wrong and right and are not easily convinced by intellectual answers and their status is really a cry for wanting a perfect world. So too with people who are apathetic, I find with myself it can be a response to being burned in one's hopes and the fear to get hurt once again. But underneath it all is a fire waiting to bust out.
So even though kaltkeit is worse the potential for greater heights is ever present. And this falls in line with the principle of Kol HaGvoah beYoser etc.

Simcha & Breslov

I recently watched a video of Breslov Chassidim stopped in middle of a street in Chevron and dancing with soldiers who were in middle of a break from searching for the kidnapped youths. I was thinking that it is good to raise the spirits of people who might be down. Then another thought crossed my mind, we constantly need to be b'simcha even during mrirus and certainly when performing a mitzvah and certainly when performing such a special mitzvah.

Soul & Body

A member of our Talmud Class mentioned an interesting idea recently. In Soviet Russia they would prove that the soul doesn't exist. How would they do it? they would present a study to the class that showed that the weight of a body after death is exactly the same as before death. Hence, even though ostensibly the soul left the body and there should be a weight loss the lack of weight loss proves that the soul doesn't exist!

A USB memory card that has an encyclopedia on its hard drive and then it is erased weighs exactly the same.

The Three Act Play

Part One

Act One: The guy is alone in the room. He feels great. After all his opinion is uncontested. that obviously he must be right. there is no one else in the room. no kidding nobody is disagreeing. There is only one person in the room.  

Act Two: Then, it happens. Someone else enters the room and boom - there is disagreement. The two of them begin shouting at each other, they won’t stop, it’s annoying yet not surprising. After all there are two people in the room, each entitled to their own perspective.  

Act Three: eventually the third guy shows up and begins to listen to the arguments thrown back and forth. after a while he cries: hey! the two of you are saying the same things in different words! if you just listen for a moment you will discover that, in fact, there is no disagreement.

Part Two

Act One: G-d is the only existence there is nothing else aside from him. He is one. But only because there is no one else to disagree.

Act Two: Sensing the inherent problem with this form of unity G-d created the universe; as expected, disagreement erupts. G-d feels that he is the definition of reality, after all he is the creator of the universe. The people walking the earth, however, disagree. Even those who concede the point and acknowledge that G-d is indeed the creator, do not accept the “Unity of G-d Theory”. After all, the human being is born feeling that he is the center of the universe, that the world around him is the ultimate reality, and that spirituality, while an interesting idea, is not the definition of reality. So the dispute goes on. Lasting thousands of years.

Act Three: Along comes Abraham. Listening carefully to the universe around him as well as to his soul pulling him to toward G-d, he discovers that if one looks deep enough, the dueling voices each shouting their own opinion are not in dispute. That the universe is essentially declaring the greatness of it's creator. Thus the father of Judaism discovers: that the true oneness I'd found in the third perspective which perceives the unity of the first two, seemingly contradictory perspectives.

Part Three

The opening statement of the Ethics of our Fathers states: "look at three things and you will not come to sin" and it goes on to enumerate the three things one should "look" at. The Rebbe taught that this above mentioned statement is not just an introduction rather it is telling us "look at the message of the number three and you will not come to sin"; if wherever you look in the universe you will see, not number two - the universe as it appears to dispute G-d's oneness - rather you will see "number three" the universe as an expression of the unity of  God then you will never sin.

And if you still have patience for one more "three" then look at the third teaching in the third chapter of the Ethics where is states: "Three people who ate on one table and spoke words of Torah it is as if they ate of G-d's table". If Judaism has one message it’s this: G-d can be felt not only on Yom Kippur, which the Torah refers to as “once a year” - perhaps because by refraining from eating and drinking and other material pleasures we experience the unity of G-d as it existed before creation. Judaism understands the power of Three (“three people eating at one table”). it understands that the physical universe represented here by food, is where one can experience the tru oneness of the one G-d.

(Parshas Emor 5749. Final paragraph is an Eigene Vort)

Four Thoughts for Your Seder

Why ask Why?

We send our kids to School to learn the “how’s” of life: how to read, how to write, how to make friends, how to get into Yale, how to be successful. Unfortunately, we also un-teach them how to ask why. Anyone who ever spent anytime with young children knows that all they want to know is why: Why is the sky blue? Why does the elephant have a funny nose? Why don't I have wings. So we send them to school and hope that for the money we pay for tuition the kids will leave us alone, we hope that they stop asking why and start learning how.   

That’s why the four questions of the passover Seder - “why is this night different than all other nights - is so important. It teaches us and our children to spend some time on the most important questions of life that are questions of why: Why am I here? Why should I be successful? Why should I be a good person.

Bitter Herbs

One of the herbs that me be used for the at the Seder for the “bitter herbs” is lettuce. For although lettuce is not bitter, it’s root is bitter, and we can therefore use the lettuce leaf. Therein lies a powerful message: bitterness is good only if it propels you to improve and escape the bad situation. Bitterness is only acceptable if the bitter root leads to a tasty leaf.

The Flowers

The Passover Haggadah describes the question of the wise son as follows:

What does the wise one say?

“What are the testimonies, the statutes, and the laws that G‑d, our G‑d, has commanded to you?”

You should instruct him in all the laws of Passover: “After the Passover offering, one should not then conclude the meal with dessert which would wash away the taste of the Passover offering.”

If the wise son is so wise then why is he asking about the laws and statutes? Doesn't he need to know the law to be considered a wise son?

The wise son is really asking: 

The wise son is really asking: "is there one law in the Torah that captures the essence of our relationship with G-d? One that caused G-d to shatter the laws of nature when He saved us from Egypt? The wise son knows the law, he wants to figure out the hierarchy of the law, he wants to know which one captures the essense of our bond with G-d. 

And we tell him that what G-d really loves is not so much the law that he commands us to do rather it’s the additions that the Jewish people add to Judaism. Case in point: G-d commands us to eat the passover offering, yet we go a step further, we instituted that one should not eat any food after eating the passover offering so that the taste of the passover offering will remain in one’s mouth. This extra detail is a greater expression of love then the actual performing of the Mitzvah, which is a Biblical obligation. It has the magical power to express love. just as paying the mortage for your spouse does not express as much love as buying her flowers.   

The Four Cups of Wine

At the Seder we drink four cups of wine to commemorate the four expressions of redemptions that G-d promised the Jews: "I will take you out from the suffering of Egypt, and I will deliver you from their bondage; I will redeem you with an outstretched arm and with great judgments. I will take you to Myself as a nation, and I will be to you a G-d...".

A closer reading of these four expressions will show that there are only three expressions of redemption, while the fourth - “I will take you to Myself as a nation” - refers not to the exodus from Egypt but to the Jewish people becoming G-d’s nation at mount Sinai weeks after the exodus. The reason that the fourth expression is included as an expression of redemption is because for the Jew freedom from bondage is not enough. To be free the Jew must achieve spiritual freedom, and for that we need to go to Sinai.