Speak to the Rock

We all heard the story: the Jews needed water in the desert, G-d tells Moses to speak to the rock and it will give its waters, Moses hit the rock instead of speaking to it and was therefore denied the great merit of entering the land of Israel.

As the Torah states:  

"The Lord spoke to Moses, saying: Take the staff and assemble the congregation, you and your brother Aaron, and speak to the rock in their presence so that it will give forth its water. You shall bring forth water for them from the rock and give the congregation and their livestock to drink." Moses took the staff from before the Lord as He had commanded him. Moses and Aaron assembled the congregation in front of the rock, and he said to them, "Now listen, you rebels, can we draw water for you from this rock?" Moses raised his hand and struck the rock with his staff twice, when an abundance of water gushed forth, and the congregation and their livestock drank."

There are many mysteries in this story; let’s start with the basics: if G-d was so upset with Moses, why did he then perform a miracle causing water to gush forth from a rock despite Moses hitting the rock? And why was G-d so offended by the hitting of the rock instead of speaking to it?

If I believe that something is beyond my reach - that I can't master this wisdom, learn to play this instrument, or overcome this challenge - there are two ways you can help me grow. You can force me to do it. You can just throw me into the pool and I'll have no choice but to figure out how to swim. I will be forced to achieve what I thought was impossible. I will, however, achieve this only because of a force outside of myself. The downside is that since the growth is forced upon me by external circumstances, therefore once the circumstances change I will be back to my old self.

The more effective option is for you to show me that deep within me lies abundant potential; you show me that to grow I need not look to a force outside me rather I need to look inward. Only when the growth is not forced upon me, will it last.

You want to teach your child, or your student, yet you feel you hit a wall; he or she just does not get it. You began to think "I am wasting my time, there is no one home". You feel like your only option is to “hit the rock”, to force the growth upon then, by applying pressure from the outside, by the force of your charisma, or by the threat of consequence, or an award of a vacation to Europe. You will probably manage to get some water out of the rock. But you missed the point.  

Or you can “speak” to what to you looks like a rock. You think your child cannot listen, understand and identify with the message, understand that you are misjudging. G-d says: “speak to the rock in their presence so that it will give forth its water”, what appears to you as a rock is a fountain. Speak again and again, dig deeper and deeper, and you’ll discover the water.   

Chesed Shel Emes

I've recently been at a few funerals and I have been thinking about that which we say that the Mitzvah of burying someone is a Chesed Shel Emes because it cannot be repaid.
It seemed to me that extra hasbarah was called for because it is possible for a variety of reasons to gain benefit, e.g. from relatives or onlookers who now respect you more etc.
So the focus is on the deceased, and this applies whether you them or not. How does one truly express friendship and brotherhood? It is a true expression when it is done without calculations and that expresses itself when the fellow is deceased and there is no possibility of give and take and therefore this is the truest expression of friendship. And this is perhaps even better expressed when you didn't know the deceased, it is even a truer expression of Ahavas Yisrael.
We can connect this to Emes made up of the letters Aleph, Mem and Tuv. There is no hefsek.
But like everything in the world there can be corruption mitzad taruvis tov v'ra, So it is upon us to make sure that like everything else we need to make sure we are focused on the right reason for it.